my chest hurts
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sanctuary is found on the dance floor. spirits are filled and pain is paused. last year’s attack at pulse night club in orlando, during latino night - was an attack on all of us who have ever feared loving openly in public.
today, we mourn the loss of 49 people. today, we speak their names.
today, we stand with all those who were and continue to be impacted by the pulse night club attack.
as pride month continues, remember to remember that PRIDE IS STILL POLITICAL and it is STILL NECESSARY! REMEMBER that we are NOT alone.
love louder, rage more and march harder!
So it’s pride month y'all and I came out twice! Both have been very bittersweet.
I was about 15 years old when I told my parents I was gay. I was 20 years old when I told my parents I was HIV positive. Looking back on it now as a 24-year-old, these past 10 years have been filled with milestones. Yo! Shit hasn’t been easy. I have cried but with every tear came laughter. I have fallen but continuously gotten back up - every time. I have experienced heart breaks over and over and over and still use my heart to guide me.
In these past 10 years, I have met so many inspirational people. Some longer than others and others shorter but felt like forever. I have learned more about myself. as much as I tried to deny I am my father son. I am his son. Attitude and all! And my mothers too! Goodness, I’m extra dramatic! But I love it.
I have tried to live each day like it was my last day. In the short five years that I have been living and thriving with HIV, I am always reminded that “You can either lay there and let it consume or you can get up and do something…” A wise woman who I adore, even though she is a pain in the ass told this.
This means so much more to me than just being gay or being HIV+. This means owning who are you and what you believe in. Owning the fact that no one can take your magic away from you. Pride is about resistance and claiming your place in this world. This is my message to myself and to anyone who will listen to me. LoL
- Jorian Rivera, Philadelphia
today is national HIV long-term survivors day. today we honor, celebrate and continue to stand alongside the long-term survivors of the HIV epidemic. this year’s theme is HIV Resilient. there was a time when surviving and thriving with HIV was science fiction - but here we are. still existing and still resisting!
many of us have defied the odds. and we still have years to go! we salute you and know that many of us are here because many of you fought for the possibility for us just to simply be. thank you.
“because even AIDS, stigma, homophobia, racism, white supremacy, violence and oppression can’t keep us from rising. and when we become ancestors, we will continue rise in the voices of those who speak our names without shame.
so keep rising varones because resurrections are real.”
every damn time i hear justin bieber’s voice on “despacito.”
also peep the video of justin pretty much saying “fuck you” to the song as he sings “blah, blah, blah” and other words like “dorito” and “burrito.”
standing solidarity with the puerto rico national strike. our young people, teachers and families all over the island, we send you love & light in the quest for liberation.
on this very day last year, we screened our documentary at the fifth annual latino film festival. we were the only film to highlight an experience from the latinx queer community.
i remember being ecstatic. our modest documentary was shot partly with an iphone 3 and with absolutely no budget. never did we imagine that our project would be a part of any film festival. needless to say, we were crying tears of joy.
we spent the entire day at the festival lifting the voices of queer and gay latino men. so much so that we were too tired to go to any after party. anthony, sean and myself just went home to rest. philly pride was the next day and i had three gv interviews scheduled.
we planned to share these pictures the following monday. we planned to share our joy with you all. that did not happen.
the following morning, i got several texts about a shooting in orlando. details were far and few in between. i wasn’t sure how to progress the information, however little. i had a busy day day ahead of me and was trying to stay focused.
as i made my way through philly pride with my then 13 year old son, i began to get details of the massacre. i saw anthony, who is generally has the emotional capacity of a brick, tear up. this is when i knew i had to stop and feel the impact. i began to finally check for details on cnn. this is when i broke. my son asked my i was tearing up. i told him. he was silent. we were all silent. we had literally spent the past two days lifting voices of the community that was murdered.
we spent the following months processing and trying to heal.
we have not shared these pics until now. one of our proudest moments exists with one of our most saddest. our lives and the lives of many queer latinx were different on june 11, 2016. we all awoke to a very different reality on june 12, 2016. however, our stories did not start or end on that day. our stories and our legacy continue.
- louie
*please excuse any typos. wrote and posted while out building community with varones at pride*