The Gran Varones is a legacy project that uses video and photography to tell the stories of Latino & Afro-Latino Gay, Queer and Trans men. Our stories shine light on what being “out” and “proud” means to us, our families, and our communities.
“sway” (for my mother)
and i have never trusted the sounds
of trumpets and drums
i would always run into the space
where the sounds of the simple pace
of pretty pianos played
i dance slow and calm
imagining my mother’s hand
in my palm
and we sway to the music
that allows us to envision
words and scenes
glittery eyes and dreams
that never take anything
but pain away
so we sway.
sway with the silent
courage of waiting
for our hearts to set themselves free
because initiative has always taken
much out of me
mother has always followed my lead
and so we wait
as interludes play
and we sway with abandon
because sometimes words
are too slight to say
things that undo crying eyes
and contents that fill
the space between
wanting to live and wanting to die
but we try to bare
with sounding trumpets
and banging drums
we imagine piano keys
cooing our ears
blocking the sound of fast winds
as we run
and sway.
we asked varones to send us pics of them with their mothers. and just are a few of the beautiful the pictures that were shared with us. we celebrate the mothers in our lives and love us unconditionally!
Louie: So it’s Pride Month – what was the
first gay club you ever went to?
Brian: It was a club in New Orleans called
club fusions. I was 18 and I went with my older brother. I remember being so
uncomfortable because it wasn’t was I was used to. I remember getting hit on
all night and after my brother got a couple drinks for me I let loose and started
to enjoy myself. I moved to New Orleans right after high school to live with my
dad. My mom thought it would be a good idea for me to get out of Philadelphia.
Louie: When did you move to Philly? Was the
change good for you?
Brian: I’ve been raised in and out of Philly
most of my life. And as far as Philly being good for me at that time in my life,
no. I needed structure and I was going down the wrong road being here which is
why my parents made the decision to send me to Louisiana. The scene was such a
culture shock for me when move there. I was completely ignorant to anything
other than Philadelphia. When I moved back it was like I never left and nothing
changed.
Louie: Things are looking up with your
engagement, huh?
Brian: Yes, well I’m actually legally married
as of March 18, 2016. My husband was a blessing that I always say “fell
out of the sky” when I thought about giving up on love he taught me how to
again and made me believe that happiness is possible. I knew then I had to tie
him down. LoL
Louie: So I always get asked, “Are
you Latino?” or “Are you ‘full’ Latino?” It irks my life. Do you get that
question?
Brian: Not all the time but I do get the
question what are you mixed with lol and as soon as I say Dominican people are
like “Aahhhh, that’s what it is.” LoL
Brian Rodriguez, Philadelphia
Interviewed and Photographed by: Louie A. Ortiz-Fonseca
sanctuary is found on the dance floor. spirits are filled and pain is paused. last year’s attack at pulse night club in orlando, during latino night - was an attack on all of us who have ever feared loving openly in public.
today, we mourn the loss of 49 people. today, we speak their names.
today, we stand with all those who were and continue to be impacted by the pulse night club attack.
as pride month continues, remember to remember that PRIDE IS STILL POLITICAL and it is STILL NECESSARY! REMEMBER that we are NOT alone.
My name is Alexander Velez and I am representing the Gran Varones. The Gran Varones is a legacy project that uses the art of storytelling to lift the voices of Latino & Afro-Latino Gay, Queer and Trans men. We stand alongside with Juntos, the Black and Brown Workers Collective and GALAEI to demand that Carolina Cabrera Digiorgio resign as CEO of Congreso.
As an Afro-Latino queer man, I don’t have the luxury and privilege of separating my life from my politics. My mere existence is a political act of resistance. I, along with other varones, are Congreso’s target population for their HIV prevention programs. We are also the target of Trump, who seeks to not just build wars to keep us separated from our families, healthcare, and life-saving HIV treatment, but he seeks to build walls of oppression that threaten to crush our very existence. Carolina Cabrera Digiorgio is in complete support of Trump and because of this, we demand that step down from her position as CEO.
As an Afro-Latino queer man, I know that silence equals death. I want you all to know that our loud protest is in the name of every who died and fought for an AIDS health care system that now allows Trump supporters like Carolina Cabrera Digiorgio to be in a position of power. Her support and any support of Trump’s racist and fascist regime is a threat to our lives.
Our loud protests are for all of the varones who once layed on hospital beds with a sinking t-cell count counting the minutes until you could hold down your food.
Our loud protests are for all of the varones who avoided looking into mirrors because the sunken face reflection did not reflect the beauty you behold.
Our loud protests are for all of the varones who pieced themselves back together piece by piece after the violence of stigma left them broken and beat.
Our loud protests are for all the varones who survive life by surviving one night at a time.
We salute you.
We praise you.
Because even AIDS,
Stigma,
Homophobia,
Racism,
White supremacy,
Oppression
and whack ass Trump supporters like Carolina Cabrera Digiorgio will not scare us into silence.
We stand on the side of liberation. Carolina, which side are you on?
- gran varones statement at today’s community protest in front of Congreso de Latinos Unidos demanding that congreso’s ceo step down.
today is national HIV long-term survivors day. today we honor, celebrate and continue to stand alongside the long-term survivors of the HIV epidemic. this year’s theme is HIV Resilient. there was a time when surviving and thriving with HIV was science fiction - but here we are. still existing and still resisting!
many of us have defied the odds. and we still have years to go! we salute you and know that many of us are here because many of you fought for the possibility for us just to simply be. thank you.
“because even AIDS, stigma, homophobia, racism, white supremacy, violence and oppression can’t keep us from rising. and when we become ancestors, we will continue rise in the voices of those who speak our names without shame.
so keep rising varones because resurrections are real.”
So it’s pride month y'all and I came out twice! Both have been very bittersweet.
I was about 15 years old when I told my parents I was gay. I was 20 years old when I told my parents I was HIV positive. Looking back on it now as a 24-year-old, these past 10 years have been filled with milestones. Yo! Shit hasn’t been easy. I have cried but with every tear came laughter. I have fallen but continuously gotten back up - every time. I have experienced heart breaks over and over and over and still use my heart to guide me.
In these past 10 years, I have met so many inspirational people. Some longer than others and others shorter but felt like forever. I have learned more about myself. as much as I tried to deny I am my father son. I am his son. Attitude and all! And my mothers too! Goodness, I’m extra dramatic! But I love it.
I have tried to live each day like it was my last day. In the short five years that I have been living and thriving with HIV, I am always reminded that “You can either lay there and let it consume or you can get up and do something…” A wise woman who I adore, even though she is a pain in the ass told this.
This means so much more to me than just being gay or being HIV+. This means owning who are you and what you believe in. Owning the fact that no one can take your magic away from you. Pride is about resistance and claiming your place in this world. This is my message to myself and to anyone who will listen to me. LoL
last july, we had the opportunity to share time and space with angel santigo, jr. he met with us just days after getting out of the hospital. we were left inspired and so moved by his joyous spirit.
I don’t know where I fit in. *stares at the emo and sweats*
softchongo
EXCUSE ME. How DARE YOU simplify white culture this much?! As someone with a WHOLE PhD in White Culture I am APALLED that you would leave out the fusion aspect of white culture which is VITAL to their survival and reproductive evolution, as well as cultural linguistosocio capabilities. Behold the TRUE types of white people, taking fusion into account below:
macho-queen
